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Through the fire: A Journey of resilience, strength

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Today, I had the privilege of attending the Up You Women’s Conference, organised by the inspiring Ezinne Kufre-Ekanem . The theme, ‘Through the Fire’, brought together powerful speakers who shared their stories on overcoming various stages and types of adversity.

Initially, I thought I didn’t need to hear more about adversity — I often deal with mine in silence. But wow, the stories these women shared were truly mind-blowing. Hearing what they’ve endured and overcome left me extremely humbled and reflective. I honestly have no grounds to complain about anything, considering I haven’t experienced even a fraction of what these women have endured.
Adversity often feels like a relentless fire, testing our limits and pushing us to the edge. But as I listened to the incredible speakers today, I was reminded that within the flames, there is an opportunity for growth and transformation. I have managed to weave the quotes from some of the speakers that resonated with me:

Nkiru Olumide-Ojo reminded us that we’re all at different points on the “barometer of pain”. She urged us to recognize our struggles while also building a “wall of accolades” to celebrate how far we’ve come. She highlighted that “people see you before they SEE you”, emphasising that even in the midst of our battles, it’s essential to look good — it’s a vital part of our armor.

Sola Adesakin encouraged us to “walk in the fire with your head held high”, and reassured us that we “already have something in our hands to create wealth”. The tools for our success are within us, even in the midst of our trials.

Eden Onwuka’s session was a cocktail of emotions — I felt every possible feeling as she shared her story. She wears her scars with grace and a gigantic smile. She inspired us to “shame your shame”. and reminded us that “adversity has not come to erase you but to advance you”. Her words drove home the point that “you can make a bad situation worse by your attitude and mindset”.

Ambassador Unyime-Ivy King reinforced the importance of attitude, reminding us that “your mindset is everything — if your mind is broken, your body will feel it”. She explained that “nothing means anything unless the meaning we give to it”, and emphasised that “attitude is everything in adversity”. Our mindset is what shapes our reality, determining whether we rise from the ashes or remain consumed by the flames.

Olaide Omosebi’s words echoed in my mind: “Don’t give up… Get back up”, and never let defeat be the final word. She reminded us to “never say never”, because every setback is just a setup for a comeback.
With her usual dramatic flair, Fadekemi Olumide-Aluko shared a profound truth: “Feel the pain, Don’t ignore it”. It’s through acknowledging our pain that we heal, for as she wisely noted that “we repeat what we don’t repair.” She encouraged us to “Do one thing that reduces the suffering of another person every day”, a commitment I am now pledging to uphold.

Together, these powerful voices have shown me that adversity is not the end—it’s the fire that refines us, the challenge that builds our strength, and the journey that ultimately leads to our greatest triumphs.

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